Monday, June 25, 2012

Atheists Don't Worship Satan

By: Matthew Chatterton

Theists constantly accuse atheists of being Satan worshipers. If people thought that atheists worshiped Satan, then atheists would be chased down by lynch mobs. This is an insane and grotesque lie and anyone who utters it is a fool or malevolent liar!

With that being said, if you are a theist, watch this video. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q1dpQKntj_w.

That's all I have to say but I do want to make a few notes. Theists, keep watching that video; the rest is really boring.
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My fellow Satan worshiping atheists, I have received a letter from Lucifer, himself!

    Dear infidels,

I have been observing your work. The plan is coming to fruition. Now that mainstream Christianity accepts evolution and acceptance of gays is on the rise, will we soon be able to indoctrinate children into atheism and homosexuality but we are ready for the next step. We must now convince people that babies taste really, really good. If we accomplish that, we will be able to feast like no king has ever feasted before. Atheists, I'm relying on you.

    Love, Satan ♥♥♥

I will conduct a study that will determine the best way to weaken family values so we can make Satan proud. If you have any ideas, please leave a comment.

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